We LOVE Daddy!
Cousin Cole
This is Sorin's (second) cousin Cole, my cousin Amanda's son. We love him. Sorin loves his cousin Cole. Cole is 10 months old, a CUTE little guy, very expressive and engaging and Sorin loves to have him around. We've always gotten a kick out of how the two of them look at each other very seriously and with such interest. Amanda brought Cole over the other day and Sorin shared some of his pretzels with him while they sat on the couch and stared at each other.
Norah's First Bottle
This morning I gave Norah her first bottle. Katie has been very sleep deprived lately. Norah doesn't sleep much more than an hour overnight. So we're back to our routine we started with Sorin where I get up around 5 and give her a bottle.
It's a wonderful feeling for me to have her in my arms and provide for her what she can't provide for herself. She's fully relying on me (and what mom has provided in that bottle). Additionally I'm able to allow Katie some more sleep.
This morning I thank God that He has made me a morning person and that I can in this small way facilitate a good morning for the family.
Mother's Day 2010
We're in a great season of life where there are so many firsts. I remember our first Mother's day 2008 when we were only pregnant with Sorin. Then of course last year we had Sorin with us but he didn't contribute much to the day except a couple dirty diapers and some naps.
But this year included some great firsts. I enjoyed shopping for a card and flowers with Sorin the day before Mother's Day, so that everything was in the house when
mom woke up. My favorite part was having Sorin hold the marker as he and I wrote "To Mom, From Sorin." Then I actually let him scribble his own little "art" all over the middle of the card. Hey, it was a better contribution than last year's diapers.We celebrated Mother's Day with a nice breakfast at the house. Then we went to the Arboretum for a walk and fresh air. It was a beautiful day and Sorin had a great time running around while we pushed Norah. What a joy to have two children this year. Of course this is also another of our firsts. It felt a little more like a family with two kids; more full, more complete.
After the Arboretum we went to my parents' house for a family meal. Then it was back to the house for afternoon naps. When I think of Mother's Day, I think how hard Katie works at what she does. No one sees what I see: all the thought, care, and effort she puts into her family. The other
night I told her she's a pro. That's literally how I think of her efforts as a parent. She's so thorough at what she does. She makes me proud and she brings me comfort in regards to the well being of our family.
Sibling Bonding
We're two weeks in and doing well. Sorin has been a very good big brother, very sweet and kind. He pats Norah's head whenever he passes her, or puts his head on her for a 'hug.' When he goes to bed he says good night to her and 'kisses' her (he makes the kissing motion but never quite makes contact). It is very cute and we sincerely hope it continues ; ).
I think it has been the hardest on me feeling my attentions being so divided. I did not expect to feel sad about that but I really can't give Sorin the attention that I have with having to give Norah so much care. I have had to try very hard not to feel bad about that. I am continuing to accept that this is natural and I will grow into this role of mother of two. There is an underlying sadness though. It does not help things that I can't lift him up (because of having had a c-section) but that, as well, will soon change. Change is hard, but good. And here is a glimpse of the overarching good:
Dad's First Connection Between Sorin and Norah
When Sorin was only a few months old, I would sometimes be the one to get out of bed and console his crying. Often it was very frustrating because I had never spent so much time with a child and I hardly knew what I was doing.
Then I found the march.
Our home was 726 Briar Hill in Madison. We had hardwood floors and not much area to work with. I think I was across the living room in four steps, the dining room in three, and another couple in the kitchen. Then a smooth u-turn and I was retracing my route.
But it wasn't the route that comforted Sorin. It was the rhythm of my pace and specifically the hitch in my step that produced just enough motion to bring Sorin to a happy place (which in turn took me to a very happy place).
Last night I started to experience the same results with Norah that I perfected with Sorin. What I had already discovered is that she enjoys having her head lean over my forearm as I'm holding her; it almost drapes over the side, but she loves it.
Maybe you've found a similar march when you walk your kids to sleep. If so, can you keep it to yourself and just let me have this one. I have a pretty big sense of accomplishment right now.
A Father's First Thoughts of a Daughter
Norah has been with us just over one week. It truly feels like a "perfect family", like people were saying when we announced we were having a girl. One boy, one girl. What a great addition. Of course nothing really noteworthy has happened this week. It's not like she's doing new and crazy things each day like Sorin. But that doesn't mean I'm short on material. Sorin has prepared me for what's to come with Norah. I've always thought about raising a son. But I humbly admit I've never thought of the details of raising a daughter.
The title of my personal blog is "Hans' Game Plan." I talk about how a great coach has a game plan to effectively navigate himself throughout a game, profession, life, whatever. All I know about raising a girl right now is how to change her diaper.
Next.
I have no clue what's next. All I know is that a strong girl becomes a strong woman more readily if she has a strong dad growing and developing her. What will that look like for me? How will I relate to my little girl and give her guidance?
It's not like I need the answers this week. But it's been an interesting week of pondering the future. I don't think I did that as much (especially in the first week) with Sorin. Because like I said I've been planning his fathering for years. But Norah, now there's a project.
But what an honor and challenge to raise a girl, raise a woman. The possibilities are so bright. Don't hear this as idealistic - I certainly understand the difficulties in our future as parents. But I also believe God has made me aware and allowed me to study relationships, especially mentoring, coaching, and even parenting that will be invaluable down the road.
The goal is a strong daughter. The catalyst will be a strong father.
Off to work.
